For some months now, looking up into those hill caused a tinge of sadness in me. It made me sad, I that I couldn't, was unable to ride them. It reminded me that I couldn't ride at all. Then a month ago at my final biopsy, I realized that in all likelihood, my prednisone level (prednisone is a steroid) had reached its minimum dose. why is this important? Because prednisone can cause osteoporosis, in fact I'm on permanent calcium supplements, because I take it. Finally being, at the minimum dosage meant that my bones could recover, which meant that I could finally resume high-impact activities - like mountain biking. And I am back - Towsley is a long way off for me, but each day I pass it, and each time I ride I know I'm close. But honestly, Towsley is an intermediate goal. My true goal is this
How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on... when in your heart you begin to understand... there is no going back? There are somethings that time cannot mend... some hurts that go too deep... that have taken hold.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Climbing Up the Mountain
Everyday, on my way to and home from work, I pass Towsley Canyon, which is a little local park just off of I-5 right as you come over Newhall Pass from Los Angeles. It's not the swing set and grassy field kind park, it the undeveloped hiking trails kind of park. Unlike a lot of parks in the area that bizarrely give a lot of preference to horses and discriminate against bikes, you can actually mountain bike on the trails here. In fact it was one of the first places I rode when I moved to CA a couple years ago. It's not a particularly long trail, 4 miles round trip, but it's challenging, the climbing is steep with sharp switchbacks, and unrelenting. At the top, you are afforded a view of the Santa Clarita Valley, not much to look at, but I wonder, if it was ever really clear, you might be able to see the southern tip of the Sierras.
For some months now, looking up into those hill caused a tinge of sadness in me. It made me sad, I that I couldn't, was unable to ride them. It reminded me that I couldn't ride at all. Then a month ago at my final biopsy, I realized that in all likelihood, my prednisone level (prednisone is a steroid) had reached its minimum dose. why is this important? Because prednisone can cause osteoporosis, in fact I'm on permanent calcium supplements, because I take it. Finally being, at the minimum dosage meant that my bones could recover, which meant that I could finally resume high-impact activities - like mountain biking. And I am back - Towsley is a long way off for me, but each day I pass it, and each time I ride I know I'm close. But honestly, Towsley is an intermediate goal. My true goal is this
Chumash is the trail that I road the evening of my heart attack, when all this started. I will never be able to leave what happened to me behind, but I think this may be a good start to moving on. So, on July 30th, 2009, exactly 1 year to the date of my heart attack, I plan to ride this trail again, and this time, I will survive.
For some months now, looking up into those hill caused a tinge of sadness in me. It made me sad, I that I couldn't, was unable to ride them. It reminded me that I couldn't ride at all. Then a month ago at my final biopsy, I realized that in all likelihood, my prednisone level (prednisone is a steroid) had reached its minimum dose. why is this important? Because prednisone can cause osteoporosis, in fact I'm on permanent calcium supplements, because I take it. Finally being, at the minimum dosage meant that my bones could recover, which meant that I could finally resume high-impact activities - like mountain biking. And I am back - Towsley is a long way off for me, but each day I pass it, and each time I ride I know I'm close. But honestly, Towsley is an intermediate goal. My true goal is this
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